No, wait, I am in love again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This one is hot. He is sleek. He cleans floors. I have lusted for him for years ever since I became aware of him. He has a delicious techyum kind of vibe. Meet Anubis--our new iRobot Roomba.





Think I'll buy Scoomba next time himself goes to sea.


Check out my boys they did a skit called Farting Dog (because fart humor is the best when you are a 9 year old boy) at the last Cub Scout pack meeting. Sorry about the dark pictures. Enjoy!

sometime you just have to poke fun. . .

. . . at the nasty homophobic types.

I am in love!

the only thing cuter than this guy is his kitty.

fragmented

I'm a little fractured right now. A certain adult female in my life who shall remain nameless chose to call & be rather antisocial to me while drinking with another adult female. I think I've moved beyond caring about what they said--even though it was worth 5 years of therapy. But the fact that I had trouble being mean back is bugging me & the fact that I know I will forgive at least the one for being mean drunk party girl & purposely selecting me to be their verbal punching bag--not because they deserve it but because I can't hold the rage & I need to forgive them for me & my beliefs. I'm planning on writing them a letter detailing why what they said was wrong, cruel & they should have never done it drunk or not. & I am so not talking to them for a few months. But if they weren't family (whether by choice or blood, I shan't say), I could walk away & forget them. But the reason they could be so effective in hatefulness was how well they know me. A person outside of my life & not an integral part of my life couldn't have even known the boundaries were there to step over them. Using my sexuality, my past & my beliefs against me for malicious drunken amusement. Some of which I had not chosen to discuss with them in any detail--even if they could tell.

I am not ashamed of my choices & will discuss things quite honestly & openly in an appropriate forum. I am comfortable with my alt religion & my mildly kinky side (just a few sprinkles of flavor, not enough to interest anybody other than my spouse) & the things I've experience over my lifetime. I am just angry that they chose to target me because my philosophy made it easy to be mean to me. I am going through a phase where I am trying to shift from passive-aggressive to assertive & not having to go all the way into being aggressive verbally when I'm angry. I want my conflict resolution to be non-violent communication in form but that doesn't mean I am a human punching bag or rug to be walked upon. A sex positive philosophy & religious tolerance & having made peace with an abusive past are not topics for humor, drunk or not. They are a reason for pride & joy & I will not let them take it from me. I will not allow them to push me back into the place where the only answer for rudeness is rudeness. I don't want to be like that. & I won't. I'm also angry that less than a day later I am already trying to see their side & move on. But I don't think they deserve it.

I wish himself was not at sea--I don't think it would have upset me so bad if he had been here. But I am blessed with caring, supportive friends who are helping me deal.

Sometimes it really is the other person. This seems to be the theme of the season. Usually, I think conflicts are caused through miscommunication &/or lack of knowledge & understanding. But I don't think so this time. They knew what they were doing. & they knew better--because you should never say the things they said. Therapists spend years saying the opposite to abuse victims & they knew that. Even if they thought I could take it & not be devastated by it--they still shouldn't have said it. What they said isn't bugging me as much as why they said it & the fact that they targeted me & who they are.

Drunk is not an excuse.

It is not okay.

OK Go--no really OK Go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meet OK Go. the band. dancing in the backyard. who I adore. I've such grace, I've such beauty. fishnets & malice. A Million Ways to be Cruel.

why my I can't keep my kids on a schedule

I seem to think that classic cinema is enlightening. why I don't know especially when I'm talking about the following movie. It is now 23:07 & there is another 43 minutes to go. what are we watching you say? let me give you a hint:



that's right it's drumroll, please.

flash gordon.

it offers so much opportunity for dialogue. if you're ever in that circumstance, do this or that so you're not the girlygirl squealing & not defending your friend be the girlygirl who colorcoordiates your weapons & armor. lol. they can learn so much from it. the sad thing is. I actually mean that. I grew up on scifi/fan & I don't think it hurt me. I grew up thinking if the hero comes to save the heroine locked in the tower, the least she can do is throw the chamberpot at the guard & try to take apart the whole tower in search of MacGuyveresque weapons. Like when Princess Leia strangles Jabba the Hut with her slave chain.

in response to kira's kitties

I love J-Pop. dress like an anime character. & sometimes sing a song where you randomly shout things from another language--English.

example A: Kotani Kinya Spicy Marmalade (I swear it sounds like he yells how'd you get so marmalade at one point.)



then there is

example B: smile.dk butterfly imagine if you will, (those of you who know our Donovan) Nat Row, Donovan & I dancing around the living room mimicking the chicks. this is not beautiful music, it is repetitive & it gets stuck in your head. I love the animation from a sheer joy-joy perspective. But if you have ever danced around the room with children to it having, watched it about 50 times, it suddenly becomes glorious. I heart (make appropriate hand gestures at this point as evidenced by the cornrowed non-samurai-ist chickie babes) me some samurai.

& things from long ago to love

Redheads, yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In all their technicolor glory.

Other loves

not to be ist. let's share our love for the not Indian

RSS feeds

Ever think you've found the holy grail? I haven't got eternal life but I suddenly have more time.

I have finally taken the time to get the hang of this RSS feed thing. Did you know that you can set up to have all your readalicious blogs come to one page so you don't have to forget to check them? Dang it, why didn't you tell me? You know how clueless I am! Anyhow. I've got all my blogs set up except 1, which I always have trouble remembering where it is & it is a pain to search for, as of about 2 days ago. I just didn't want to list it on my blogs because it is about out there. er, okay more than a bit. but it makes me giggle when it doesn't make me wince. I'm off to go & find it hopefully.

because an obsession is never a bad thing.

something that made me weep

so I am a sentimentalist. but for some reason, I think love should have no limits, no boundaries, no rules except as the heart dictates. (love being an emotion that causes you to care more for the happiness loved one than your own happiness) It has no shape or form. & people who legislate try to force their beliefs on others are cruel--it's unnecessary why go a-poking in the bedroom of two consenting adults? I read complaints from both sides of the fence on this one that I thought were wrong & and I want to argue with each & every one of them. But instead. I think it stands on its own. All I know is, I can not even think about this video without tearing up.

I still heart me some Prabhu Deva

the comedic genius of it all but then there are moments of silence in the noise. a moment of beauty if the chaos of laughter. Sometimes my breath catches & I sigh. It's the mating display of stag for doe, a peacock's strut. There's a purity in watching music videos in another language that watching something in English can't compare with. I have no idea what they are saying & I revel in just the sound of the voices & musics then I desperately wish I knew what they were saying even though what I imagine is probably better. I always smile when I watch my crazy Indian music videos. I heart me some Prabhu Deva (imagine the hand to brow or fanning of the blushing cheeks). Dance, Kali, Dance. (this might make no sense to anybody but one person, you know who you are--kiss, kiss--& no I won't explain to those of you who aren't the one person)







just beautiful & had to share.

I heart me some Bollywood

Oh the manic, excessiveness of it all. when Mephistopheles was down with the plague, I spent the hours it took to log onto to YouTube & watch this repeatedly & force my children & Traci's family to watch it.

I heart me some Prabhu Deva--the way he moves it's so impressive yet so not sexy even though as well as he moves--it should be. Girlish giggles suffuse the air whenever I watch this.

why can't there be more people changing their clothes (& coordinating it with everyone around them) & dancing in the streets & field of the world? the world would be such a beautiful place if we are on island time & we saw this in everyday life.

I have listened to the song about 4 times today just hitting repeat as I type to stay in the mood.

things to share. . .

that I couldn't even get to save as a draft when Mephistopheles had the plague. Now he's just got the flue. . .

so I am going to post a series of things that evoked an emotion one way or another over the past two months.

viral love, it must be shared.

posting drafts

so I've decided to go ahead & posts some drafts that aren't finished due to photos or what not. They are really really old because I've crawled in a hole for a bit & had a little trouble finding my way out. I was probably lost. big surprise there. me lost as usual. luckily Traci & my girls from playgroup are helping me dig myself out. But part of the reason I fell into that cave is 'puter frustrations. I have actually tried to post quite a few blogs over the past 2 months but Mephistopheles (the 'puter I usually use) is buggy as hell & I can't see to get it working just right. Argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will add the other pix in later that are missing in a fresh post. If I remember, if I don't & somebody wants to see & they ask me I will do it. I just get a little forgetful most of the time.

I've been feeling off lately. I've been sick a lot with stupid illnesses that aren't very serious by are sort of draining when you add them all up. But also I've been moody so I sort of shut down. Of course the first reason didn't help with the second. But the second would have happened no matter what.

Himself is fussy about work (less so now than before as he finally finds his footing) & driving me insane. But now that he's less cranky, he's been in & out going to sea so we haven't really been able to reconnect very well. It's all very well & good to make up except for the fact that sometimes I don't hear from him for days. Not his fault but I miss him.

but onto better things:

Pix!

Halloween:

I am going to post the pix I took so you can see why I don't usually bother taking pictures.

So the three girls are Nat (my baby girl) Tori (my beloved Traci's daughter) & Ani one of Tori's friends. They went trick or treating with a group of kids in Tori's neighborhood which deadends & has so many children of so many ages going trick or treating that it looks like a neverending population boom. They had a blast. I felt good about letting her be responsible (i.e. go without me, scary much) in a safe environment as well as scared that she's growing up.


This one is Rowan & Sean (also my Traci's boy) they went with their dads



& Evan Sean's little brother. Traci & I stayed in & drank beer & handed out candy & giggled & gossiped & bitched about this & that. Which I needed.

And these are the new boots Nat got today. She's been going to the orthodontist with a friend of mine lately who's got some young kids to help out (Valerie). & Valerie had shown up at my house for a playgroup wearing boots just like that Natalie adored. So when Valerie offered to take Nat to Fred Meyer to pick up a pair for herself after the ortho appointment, I said yes. Nat got her $ together to buy the boots & was looking forward to it all morning before she left. It was so cute. When she came home, she told me that Valerie wouldn't let her pay for them. Now, Nat needs to get her Red Cross Babysitter Training before she can collect $ for watching babies & the last couple of times we tried to take her & her friends it didn't work out. So Valerie has been wanting to do something for Nat. Otherwise I'd be PayPal-ing her the $. So I told Nat that & that she should just be thankful & everytime she wears the boots she should think about Valerie & the girls & take a moment to think happy thoughts their way. I never learned to accept gifts well. I hope Nat does.